This is the first time I've blogged in over a month and unfortunately I'm not doing this in the right frame of mind. I don't use the phrase hot mess lightly. When I say hot mess, I mean hot mess and that's how I feel. I have so much drama in my life right now that I can hardly stand it at times. And to be fair, I don't deal with this much constant stress well. LeAnn, have they changed the rules yet? Am I allowed to start a sentence with the word and?? It wouldn't be so bad if the stress and drama were limited to one area of my life but they seem to be taking over everything.
In the spirit of full disclosure, I have been very bad for the last month. I haven't been eating or working out the way I should be, the way I need to be. Especially considering the fact that I was in such a good place before I left for home last month. I was so dedicated to my exercise and eating so well that the weight was just falling off. Now, I'm scared to step on the scale. In all honesty, I stepped on the scale this morning for the first time since July 15th and it made me so sad. Once I got over being sad, I was MAD AS HELL. I am becoming the one thing I promised myself I wouldn't become when I really started to lose weight. I am becoming a statistic. I am on the verge of becoming one of those people who lose a significant amount of weight and then gain it back. I've read the articles. Depending on the research there is evidence that anywhere from 70-90% of all people who lose weight gain it back, and then some. Screw that. That is not that path that I'm on. I refuse to give up. I've come so far and I am not going back.
So, this weekend is officially my reboot. I cleaned my apartment so I can start in a nice, tidy environment. I'm working on menus for this week so that I have no excuse to eat out and I'm going to make sure that I'm getting my runs in where they're supposed to be. I mean, come on. I have a 5K that I'm running with Jessica in November, I better get my butt in gear or she'll be kicking it on thanksgiving. I'm actually glad that we decided to do the Gobble Wobble (how cool of a name is that?!?!) because it gives me something concrete to work towards.
I'm enlisting Julie's help as well as she's my only local fitness friend. She's been experiencing some of the same issues as me and we've decided to keep each other on the straight and narrow. I know I can do this because, well I've done this before. I just need to stop letting stress and drama that I can't control affect the things in life that I can. That's what this 'lifestyle' change is all about right? Being able to see when you're getting nutty and spiraling out of control and then being able to pull everything back together.
On that note, I need to get my grocery list finished and head out to the store. I promise it won't take this long for me to blog again and I also promise that I will catch up on all of the blog posts that I haven't been reading in my absence!
Very happy to see you blog even though it wasn't all puppies and rainbows. It really irks me that it takes so much work to lose weight correctly and barely any effort to put it back on. I see it this way...you didn't put all your lost weight back on. Your body had been in "lose-weight" mode for quite awhile so I'm sure it will get back into the swing of things. The Gobble Wobble sounds great. Where is it being held? Also happy that Julie is a close-by resources and support. You're right about the lifestyle change. You gotta get back on the horse even when there is more chaos than sanity in life. Hope to chat with you soon!
ReplyDeleteYou got this, babe. Fact is, set backs are normal and are going to happen. The trick is to not let a minor set back become a full blown slide back into old habits.
ReplyDeleteAlso, you are so getting skinny with me so we can still go clothes shopping together, so chop chop. :P
Hey there! Don't worry about grammar with a blog. I'm not necessarily a grammar Nazi. Anywho, glad to see you're back to blogging. I'm sorry I haven't checked in a few weeks. It looks like I have some catching up to do. Being a statistic sucks, but I have an inkling that you aren't the statistic you think you are. I'm realizing more and more that life is never going to be easy. And, if it is, you're doing something wrong. I would consider your current state as a challenge to overcome. You've come a long way, overcoming many hurdles. I'm sure it sucks major toad balls that you've gained weight back, but I have confidence in your ability. You are one of the most successful weight-losers I know. Your dedication is envy-worthy. I would love to sign up for a 5K, but it hasn't happened yet. The Gobble Wobble is an awesome name. I'll get caught up on your other blogs soon.
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